The first part of this week I decided to lose weight. Again! I signed up to do Weight Watchers meetings. I’ve done Weight Watchers before but I’ve never stuck with it. I always have illusions of grandeur of what it will be like when I lose all the weight. To buy clothes in smaller sizes. Heck, just to be able to wear the bigger/smaller clothes in my closet would be great!
I picked Weight Watchers because I know me. I’m and one of those free spirits! I can’t stand to be tied down to one place or one thing. I don’t like to be told what to do or what not to do. So I need someone to make me accountable. I hate that word. Accountable. It means I have to justify my actions or decision.
I know this will sound odd but last night I realized something. As I was standing in the bathroom in front of the mirror getting ready to take a shower it hit me. I am fat! It is amazing how a person can go along and just ignore something that stares you straight in the face every time you look in a mirror. (Nothing like standing naked in front of a giant mirror to wake you up!) I am fat! Not a “little” fat but obese. First time this realization ever hit me! Yes, I know how could I go on looking in mirrors and not realize I was fat. Because I didn’t want to see that I was fat. When I looked in the mirror I saw the skinny girl I was 10 years ago. If I ignored the issue then I could pretend I didn’t have a problem. If I faced the issue it means that I would have to control what I was eating. I heard it said that the first step to getting through something is to admit there is an issue. So…. Hello, my name is Donna and I am fat!
That being said leads me to the real issue at hand. I am fat because I lack self-control. No candy coating the issue. I am fat because I didn’t exercise self-control. Proverbs 25:28 says, A person who lacks self control is like a city whose walls are broken through. A wall was built around a city to protect its people from the enemy. I have allowed holes in my walls and allowed the enemy to come in. Sometimes the enemy doesn’t comes in all at once but a little bit at a time. “One more cookie won’t hurt.” What is the enemy you ask? Diabetes. Heart Disease. High Cholesterol. I don’t have any of these diseases yet but being 100 lbs overweight it will be just a matter of time.
So today, I look at my self with all honesty and start the fight to shoring up the walls of my city.